Bailouts Gone Wild! Hustler's Larry Flynt and Girls Gone Wild Petition Congress for Cash"Americans Can Do Without Cars But They Cannot Do Without Sex"

See! See what this is all leading to! Oh the humanity!

FOX Business has this, sad, but true story.

With the financial industry, auto makers and more getting assistance from the federal government to stay afloat during the recession, the adult industry decided it would try to get something as well.

Girls Gone Wild CEO Joe Francis and “Hustler” magazine publisher Larry Flynt have said they will petition Congress for financial aid along the lines of what the Big Three auto makers are getting.

Francis said that he and Flynt are asking for $5 billion, and that they have sent letters to Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson, Congress and their local Congressman, Henry Waxman (D-Calif.) with the proposal.

With the $5 billion, they would "invest in building new means of distribution, and shoring up our distribution right now to prevent further erosion from factors like Youporn and other Internet content that has seriously affected our business over the past few years," Francis said in an interview with FOX Business. "We will use the money wisely, and we will create more jobs."

Francis said that if invited, he and Flynt would drive across the country in a hybrid vehicle to present their plans to Congress.

The press release noted that DVD sales and rentals for the adult industry have decreased by 22% in the past year, partially because people are turning more and more to the Internet for adult content.

"People are too depressed to be sexually active," Flynt said in the press release. "This is very unhealthy as a nation. Americans can do without cars and such but they cannot do without sex."

Francis said he and Flynt would also be willing to discuss the possibility of the government buying equity stakes in their companies, as was done with financial firms.

"If the government would like to be a partner with Mr. Flynt and I, we’re certainly amenable to it," he said.

Somebody make it stop.